


I Am What I Am

by katayla



Category: The Black Tapes Podcast
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-30
Updated: 2016-10-30
Packaged: 2018-08-24 08:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8365321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katayla/pseuds/katayla
Summary: Alex is missing.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Themistoklis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Themistoklis/gifts).



Alex was missing. No one had seen or heard from her in five days. Nic went through all of her recordings, her papers, her computer, and talked to everyone she'd interviewed. And Richard double-checked all his work. Twice. And then they'd teamed up and gone through every inch of Alex's office.

"I knew this podcast was a bad idea," Nic said, rubbing his eyes. It was past midnight and he was slumped on the floor next to Alex's desk. "None of this ever happened before we started hunting down demons."

Richard didn't respond, his eyes focused on the transcripts of _The Black Tapes_ he was reading for the fifth time.

"You're not going to say demons don't exist?" Nic asked. "We're recording this, you know. The great Richard Strand, finally acknowledging that there just might be more than logic and reason in this world. Listeners, all it took was one woman's disappearance--"

"Demons don't exist," Richard said. 

And it was two women. Coralee had disappeared because of him, and now Alex was gone. And in both cases, he had been completely, utterly _useless_.

"--to put a crack in his confidence," Nic continued, and Richard wondered if he'd even heard him speak. "So the question remains, will he use his long-hidden supernatural talents to find his friend or continue to ignore the fact that he can't explain everything in world, that maybe just maybe, there is more in your philosophy, Horatio, than you can explain."

Nic continued rambling, his voice growing softer and softer, and Richard wondered if he'd slept at all since Alex went missing. If any of them had. He hadn't even know what Alex was investigating. They'd argued the previous week, so naturally he didn't expect to hear from her for a while. He would've called her after a couple more days, but then the phone rang and it was the studio's number, and he thought she'd beat him to it. He'd answered it, ready to hear her apology--or was it his turn?-- but it was Nic, asking him when he'd last seen Alex.

She'd already been gone for 24 hours. And so he'd rushed to the studio and hadn't left since. And discovered . . . Nothing. No clues. No ideas about where Alex could be.

"I don't have supernatural powers," Richard said, interrupting Nic's low stream of words.

"I don't care," Nic said. He looked straight across the room at Richard. "If it were one of us, Alex would do anything to find us."

"What are you saying?"

"You _know_ what I'm saying," Nic said. "You found Bobby Mames and you can find Alex."

"I didn't--"

"Yeah, I know. I produced the episode. But if any part of you believes, if you're just sitting there and not--"

"I didn't find Coralee. You produced that episode, too." For one brief moment in time, he'd let himself believe that maybe he was wrong, that he could do something more to find his wife. And it didn't make any difference at all.

"I don't care."

"What?" Richard's voice was low and tight.

"I'm sorry you lost your wife. I'm sorry she wasn't who you thought. But she didn't want to be found and this is _Alex_."

Nic put his hands in the air. "I'm going to my office."

"I'm sorry," Richard said, not looking up from the papers in his hands.

All he heard was the sound of the door closing.

\--

"How did you find me?" Alex asked, after she and Nic had exchanged hugs, and she'd called her parents, and ate five helpings of spaghetti.

"Are you recording?" Richard asked.

Alex rolled her eyes. "Yeah, Richard, after my dramatic rescue, the first thing I did was grab my recorder."

He chuckled. "I would believe it."

"No, I'm not recording."

When Richard still didn't answer, Alex added, "Off the record."

Richard shook his head. "I don't know, Alex. I just don't know."


End file.
